My Jack White Obsession

[Mister Obvious]

Now that I'm gay, I've noticed my sex drive is WAY higher... what's up with that?!

When I was straight and bi, it was really in the shitcan!!!

Uh oh...

UH OUUUHHHHH I THINK I'M TURNING STRAIGHT AGAIN!!!

THIS IS SEXHAUSTING!!!

[Mister Obvious]

Now that I'm straight again, I'm only regular horny.

Now I can't even remember what it was like to be mega horny like I was when I was gay...

[Mister Obvious]

Being gay was so great.

[Mister Obvious]

I miss being gay.

I know there will always be some part in me somewhere that is still gay.

[Mister Obvious]

THIS HAS BEEN A JOURNEY YOU GUYS

[Mister Obvious]

Update: I am now asexual.

[THE FUNG]

Update: I am now asexual.

boolshit ya whackin

[Guest]

ya but you will sleep in till like 3pm

[Mister Obvious]

Jack's new album makes my nipples hard.

[Guest]

......

[Mister Obvious]

I want Jack to take a giant paintbrush and spread honey all over my body.

[Mister Obvious]

No, maple syrup. Grade A.

[Guest]

.......

[Mister Obvious]

Then I want us to press our bodies together and listen to the sticky sounds of the syrup as we pull back apart, like a stamp you can take off and put back on over and over.

[Mister Obvious]

Somebody unauthorized uploaded Jack's new Fear Of The Dawn album to YouTube in whole and I am offended.

Listening anyway though.

[Mister Obvious]

He kinda looks like a blue haired Ricky Ricardo on the cover.

Which is honestly hot, I always thought Ricky Ricardo was super hot.

[Mister Obvious]

https://imgur.com/a/LXRVgV0

I'm so for real.

And if anybody's gonna look at that and not understand why I want Jack White to coat me in substance from head to toe, you're a fucking idiot.

[Mister Obvious]

If you don't think Jack White is hot, you're just dumb.

You're really really dumb.

[Guest]

.. .. .. . .

[Mister Obvious]

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