11-01-2020, 10:03 PM
"The YouTube Video"
Boss has Chick meet him behind their office building. Oh this should be gooooood... lol
HNOC: "OK, what's all this then?"
Boss: "Awesome, glad you could make it!"
HNOC: "Oh you know me, wouldn't miss it for the world!" *obvious sarcasm*
Boss: "So, I saw this chick on YouTube..."
HNOC: "OK, I'm going back to work now..."
Boss: "No, wait, she had all her clothes on this time"
HNOC: "That offers me absolutely NO comfort"
Boss: "She was like a madman, totally going for it, I was jazzed the fuck up!"
HNOC: "This still YouTube you're talkin about?"
Boss: "It's called dumpster-diving!!" *super excited*
HNOC: "Ooooh God, No! Nooooo, I'm not doing it. I'm going back now..."
Boss: "Wait! Don't you want to hear about all the cool stuff she found?"
HNOC: "What, like typhus, hep C, lockjaw, AIDS?"
Boss: "Dude, are you always this much of a buzzkill?"
HNOC: "Only when you're this much of a retard!"
Boss: "So you're not interested?"
HNOC: "Wow, and it only took five whole minutes of my life that I'LL never see again!"
Boss: "OK, fine... but... Rudy came back today."
HNOC: *stares blankly*
Rudy is a fellow employee that really has it in for Chick. Even more than Boss.
He's been out with an injury for a few weeks but has returned. Chick has a decision to make.
HNOC: "I don't win, in ANY of this, do I?"
Boss: *whispers* "There are TREASURES awaiting us, right in there!" *points to what he thinks is a dumpster*
HNOC: *grabs forehead* "THAT... is the cardboard compactor..."
Boss: *thinks a moment* "Uh, is cardboard useless?"
HNOC: "I'd say it's about on par with You."
Boss: "Hmm... strategy change..."
HNOC: "I really DO hate you, sooooo very much."
Boss has an epiphany. Or maybe just another silly idea. We'll see...
Boss: "Hold on, she was also going to... *snaps fingers repeatedly* "Fuck, what are those places?"
HNOC: *closes eyes, shakes head*
Boss: "Where people go to buy drugs!?"
HNOC: "Uuuh, drug dealers?"
Boss: *looks at Chick with contempt* "Exactly how stupid DO you think I am?"
HNOC: "Oh my God, you do NOT want me to answer that!"
Boss: "Uh, those places... shit, like the place you get those weird sponges you use?"
He's referring to IUD's. Which Chick has never used. Yeah.
HNOC: "Jesus Christ, you mean a drug store?"
Boss: "YES!! A drug store! She went behind a drug store and cleaned UP!"
Chick is weighing out her options. Go back to work and get ogled by Rudy the Rapist [eye-rape, calm down! lol]
OR traipse around town with her mentally defective boss and possibly catch a disease or be arrested.
Decisions, decisions...
HNOC: "So I'm driving, I take it?"
Boss: "Good girl! Now I can crack this bottle of MD 20/20!"
HNOC: *sighs* "Of course, because it would just be weird if you weren't drinking wino booze at 10am"
They head for Chick's car to begin their adventure in.... DUMPSTER-DIVING!!! lurlz
Boss has Chick meet him behind their office building. Oh this should be gooooood... lol
HNOC: "OK, what's all this then?"
Boss: "Awesome, glad you could make it!"
HNOC: "Oh you know me, wouldn't miss it for the world!" *obvious sarcasm*
Boss: "So, I saw this chick on YouTube..."
HNOC: "OK, I'm going back to work now..."
Boss: "No, wait, she had all her clothes on this time"
HNOC: "That offers me absolutely NO comfort"
Boss: "She was like a madman, totally going for it, I was jazzed the fuck up!"
HNOC: "This still YouTube you're talkin about?"
Boss: "It's called dumpster-diving!!" *super excited*
HNOC: "Ooooh God, No! Nooooo, I'm not doing it. I'm going back now..."
Boss: "Wait! Don't you want to hear about all the cool stuff she found?"
HNOC: "What, like typhus, hep C, lockjaw, AIDS?"
Boss: "Dude, are you always this much of a buzzkill?"
HNOC: "Only when you're this much of a retard!"
Boss: "So you're not interested?"
HNOC: "Wow, and it only took five whole minutes of my life that I'LL never see again!"
Boss: "OK, fine... but... Rudy came back today."
HNOC: *stares blankly*
Rudy is a fellow employee that really has it in for Chick. Even more than Boss.
He's been out with an injury for a few weeks but has returned. Chick has a decision to make.
HNOC: "I don't win, in ANY of this, do I?"
Boss: *whispers* "There are TREASURES awaiting us, right in there!" *points to what he thinks is a dumpster*
HNOC: *grabs forehead* "THAT... is the cardboard compactor..."
Boss: *thinks a moment* "Uh, is cardboard useless?"
HNOC: "I'd say it's about on par with You."
Boss: "Hmm... strategy change..."
HNOC: "I really DO hate you, sooooo very much."
Boss has an epiphany. Or maybe just another silly idea. We'll see...
Boss: "Hold on, she was also going to... *snaps fingers repeatedly* "Fuck, what are those places?"
HNOC: *closes eyes, shakes head*
Boss: "Where people go to buy drugs!?"
HNOC: "Uuuh, drug dealers?"
Boss: *looks at Chick with contempt* "Exactly how stupid DO you think I am?"
HNOC: "Oh my God, you do NOT want me to answer that!"
Boss: "Uh, those places... shit, like the place you get those weird sponges you use?"
He's referring to IUD's. Which Chick has never used. Yeah.
HNOC: "Jesus Christ, you mean a drug store?"
Boss: "YES!! A drug store! She went behind a drug store and cleaned UP!"
Chick is weighing out her options. Go back to work and get ogled by Rudy the Rapist [eye-rape, calm down! lol]
OR traipse around town with her mentally defective boss and possibly catch a disease or be arrested.
Decisions, decisions...
HNOC: "So I'm driving, I take it?"
Boss: "Good girl! Now I can crack this bottle of MD 20/20!"
HNOC: *sighs* "Of course, because it would just be weird if you weren't drinking wino booze at 10am"
They head for Chick's car to begin their adventure in.... DUMPSTER-DIVING!!! lurlz
