11-04-2020, 11:04 PM
"Bump In The Night: Part II"
Chick and Boss meet in the office parking lot.
Boss: "You ready to rumblllllllle?!?!"
HNOC: *opens trunk, stands waiting*
Boss: "Lemme just get these..." *grabbing stuff from his trunk*
HNOC: "And why exactly are we not taking your car?"
Boss: "Insurance lapsed."
HNOC: "Of course it has."
Boss: *piling more crap into Chick's trunk*
HNOC: "Jeezus God, is all this necessary?"
Boss: "We gotta do this thing RIGHT!!"
HNOC: "Where did you even find a VHS camcorder?"
Boss: "Pawn shop."
HNOC: "And they're better for this kinda thing, than say, ooooh, THIS??" *holds up her bad-ass cell phone*
Boss: "We need to do it like the pros! And it's ALWAYS on sketchy ass video tape!"
HNOC: "Uh, I think that's because it's always FAKED!!"
Boss: "Oh ye of little faith..."
HNOC: "Look, stop! Stop filling my trunk with all this antique shit, we're using my phone!"
Boss: "You sure??"
HNOC: "Yes, I'm sure!"
Boss: "I dunno..."
HNOC: "I know, you dunno anything! But I've got this. The phone will do!"
Boss stops with the old tech crap. Chick slams trunk and our happy duo are on their way!
HNOC: "Jeez, kinda warm for November..."
Boss: "Perfect weather for ol' Squatchy!"
HNOC: "You really think we're gonna see this thing, don't you?"
Boss: "Chickie babe, I KNOW we are!"
HNOC: "Chickie what?"
Boss: "Oh, sorry... Chick."
HNOC: "Thaaat's better."
They arrive at the national park, but things seem to have taken a slight turn...
HNOC: "Hmm, looks closed?!"
Boss: "That can't be right! Says opened year round on the website."
HNOC: "Well, maybe something happened. Oh, there's a park ranger! We'll ask him!"
Chick drives over to where the ranger is parked. Boss takes over.
Boss: "Lemme handle this..." *gets out of car, walks over to truck*
HNOC: "Thiiiiis is startin' to feel like a jail day..."
Boss: "Hey, how are ya?"
Ranger: "Fine, sir. But the park's closed today. Had a wildfire."
Boss: *reaches into his pocket, pulls out a folded up bill*
Ranger: "What are you doin?"
Boss: *whispers* "Go on, take it..."
Ranger: "Excuse me??"
Boss: "Take it, go on, it's fine..."
Ranger: "Sir, are you trying to bribe me?"
Boss: "Go on, it's fine... *whispers* "It's a Twentyyy!"
Ranger: "Sir, this is a national park, not a night club. You're going to have to leave!"
Boss: "But we came so faaar!"
Ranger: "Oh yeah, where from?"
Boss: *sheepishly* "Scottsdale."
Ranger: "So, an hour and change is a long way for you??"
Boss: "I get car sick..."
Ranger: "Park won't be open until next week, try back then!"
Boss knows when he's been defeated and returns to car.
HNOC: "So, closed eh?"
Boss: "Cocksucker got lippy, can you believe that?"
HNOC: "Was that before or AFTER you insulted him with a $20 bribe?"
Boss: "Before I did WHAT??"
HNOC: "I saw the whole thing..."
Boss: "Well fuck him. Twenty was too much anyway!"
HNOC: "Clearly. So, what now?"
Boss: "Oh, you don't think I have a backup?"
HNOC: "No, I'm dry-heaving over here because I KNOW you do..."
Boss: "Whip those horses, sugar-nips! We're headin' for the Pig!"
HNOC: "Nice, a place named after You!"
Boss: "Just drive!"
Chick drives back to the city and to their local Piggly Wiggly. *may not be geographically accurate*
Which fortunately backs up onto a large wooded area. This should be fun...
TO BE CONTINUED...
Chick and Boss meet in the office parking lot.
Boss: "You ready to rumblllllllle?!?!"
HNOC: *opens trunk, stands waiting*
Boss: "Lemme just get these..." *grabbing stuff from his trunk*
HNOC: "And why exactly are we not taking your car?"
Boss: "Insurance lapsed."
HNOC: "Of course it has."
Boss: *piling more crap into Chick's trunk*
HNOC: "Jeezus God, is all this necessary?"
Boss: "We gotta do this thing RIGHT!!"
HNOC: "Where did you even find a VHS camcorder?"
Boss: "Pawn shop."
HNOC: "And they're better for this kinda thing, than say, ooooh, THIS??" *holds up her bad-ass cell phone*
Boss: "We need to do it like the pros! And it's ALWAYS on sketchy ass video tape!"
HNOC: "Uh, I think that's because it's always FAKED!!"
Boss: "Oh ye of little faith..."
HNOC: "Look, stop! Stop filling my trunk with all this antique shit, we're using my phone!"
Boss: "You sure??"
HNOC: "Yes, I'm sure!"
Boss: "I dunno..."
HNOC: "I know, you dunno anything! But I've got this. The phone will do!"
Boss stops with the old tech crap. Chick slams trunk and our happy duo are on their way!
HNOC: "Jeez, kinda warm for November..."
Boss: "Perfect weather for ol' Squatchy!"
HNOC: "You really think we're gonna see this thing, don't you?"
Boss: "Chickie babe, I KNOW we are!"
HNOC: "Chickie what?"
Boss: "Oh, sorry... Chick."
HNOC: "Thaaat's better."
They arrive at the national park, but things seem to have taken a slight turn...
HNOC: "Hmm, looks closed?!"
Boss: "That can't be right! Says opened year round on the website."
HNOC: "Well, maybe something happened. Oh, there's a park ranger! We'll ask him!"
Chick drives over to where the ranger is parked. Boss takes over.
Boss: "Lemme handle this..." *gets out of car, walks over to truck*
HNOC: "Thiiiiis is startin' to feel like a jail day..."
Boss: "Hey, how are ya?"
Ranger: "Fine, sir. But the park's closed today. Had a wildfire."
Boss: *reaches into his pocket, pulls out a folded up bill*
Ranger: "What are you doin?"
Boss: *whispers* "Go on, take it..."
Ranger: "Excuse me??"
Boss: "Take it, go on, it's fine..."
Ranger: "Sir, are you trying to bribe me?"
Boss: "Go on, it's fine... *whispers* "It's a Twentyyy!"
Ranger: "Sir, this is a national park, not a night club. You're going to have to leave!"
Boss: "But we came so faaar!"
Ranger: "Oh yeah, where from?"
Boss: *sheepishly* "Scottsdale."
Ranger: "So, an hour and change is a long way for you??"
Boss: "I get car sick..."
Ranger: "Park won't be open until next week, try back then!"
Boss knows when he's been defeated and returns to car.
HNOC: "So, closed eh?"
Boss: "Cocksucker got lippy, can you believe that?"
HNOC: "Was that before or AFTER you insulted him with a $20 bribe?"
Boss: "Before I did WHAT??"
HNOC: "I saw the whole thing..."
Boss: "Well fuck him. Twenty was too much anyway!"
HNOC: "Clearly. So, what now?"
Boss: "Oh, you don't think I have a backup?"
HNOC: "No, I'm dry-heaving over here because I KNOW you do..."
Boss: "Whip those horses, sugar-nips! We're headin' for the Pig!"
HNOC: "Nice, a place named after You!"
Boss: "Just drive!"
Chick drives back to the city and to their local Piggly Wiggly. *may not be geographically accurate*
Which fortunately backs up onto a large wooded area. This should be fun...
TO BE CONTINUED...
