11-07-2020, 01:59 PM
"The End Times"
Chick!!! Don't!!! Go!!! In!!! There!!! lol
HNOC: *walks in, finds boss in arm & leg cast, head bandaged, pushing around in a wheelchair*
Boss: *looks over to Chick*
HNOC: "Aaand?"
Boss: "Just a scrape, no biggie..."
HNOC: "Are you serious?"
Boss: "Yeah, walk it right off..."
HNOC: "Oh, I don't know, looks pretty bad from here." *kicks his leg cast hard*
Boss: "Whooa, fuck, what's your deal?"
HNOC: "This is all fake, isn't it?"
Boss: "The Hell!?"
HNOC: *squints*
Boss: "What gave me away?"
HNOC: "Besides it being You?? Uh, you're using both arms to push the wheelchair."
Boss: "So?"
HNOC: "One of them is in a CAST!" *sighs*
Boss: "Yeah?"
HNOC: "Oh sweet dying Jeezus..."
Boss: "I have a new thing going!"
HNOC: "Well that's a relief! Here I thought you were just dickin' around in here... as usual."
Boss: "Check this out!" *wheels himself towards his desk*
HNOC: *watches the pathetic show of ignorance*
Boss: "Hey, could ya?" *motions for Chick to push him*
HNOC: "RETARD! You're not injured!!"
Boss: "But I could be! Where's the compassion??"
HNOC: *walks towards door*
Boss: "NO! Wait! You haven't seen it yet!!"
HNOC: "Uurrggh, it never ends with you..."
Boss: "Get a load of this!!" *pulls up website*
HNOC: "What's this crap?"
Boss: "This crap, as you call it, is my contribution to the world!"
HNOC: *reads site heading* "Boss's Bunker Busting Booty... ??"
Boss: *shakes head yes, wide grin, proud as FUCK* [lol]
HNOC: "So, finally bottomed out and went into the porn biz, eh?"
Boss: "Porn? Psssss, bish please! This is survival gear!"
HNOC: "Surwhatal what?"
Boss: "Dehydrated food, water, supplies! Ya know, for the Apocalypse!"
HNOC: "Ooooh, so you're a doomtard?"
Boss: "Hey! Ms. High & Mighty, watch your words, it's COMING! You just wait!"
HNOC: *scrolls down page* "So, Prepper porn... "
Boss: "I'm providing a service. To people who have vision, foresight."
HNOC: "According to these prices, you're raping the desperate for a disgusting level of financial gain.."
Boss: "Outsmarting the end of the world don't come cheap, missy!"
HNOC: "Or with a conscience."
Boss: "Am I supposed to just give this stuff away, for free?"
HNOC: "No, but maybe you could leave it to reputable companies that know what they're doing.."
Boss: "You have NO faith in me!"
HNOC: "Not a drop!"
Boss: "See?"
HNOC: "When did I ever act like I did??"
Boss: "The Squatchin thing?"
HNOC: "Oh, that! I was just trying to get away from Rudy. Eye-rape is real, yo!"
Boss: "So it wasn't so we could have an adventure and ka-ching?"
HNOC: "No sweetie, by some fucked up kind of miracle, you just happened to be the lesser of two evils that day."
Boss: "Shit..."
HNOC: "Yeah..."
Boss: "What the fuck am I gonna do with five-hundred pounds of dehydrated food rations?"
HNOC: "I guess make room in that garage, right next to all those boxes of Pimp Jesus t-shirts...."
Boss: *sighs*
Chick leaves his office for once, without wanting to kill him. Well, not really wanting to. Maybe a little... lol
Chick!!! Don't!!! Go!!! In!!! There!!! lol
HNOC: *walks in, finds boss in arm & leg cast, head bandaged, pushing around in a wheelchair*
Boss: *looks over to Chick*
HNOC: "Aaand?"
Boss: "Just a scrape, no biggie..."
HNOC: "Are you serious?"
Boss: "Yeah, walk it right off..."
HNOC: "Oh, I don't know, looks pretty bad from here." *kicks his leg cast hard*
Boss: "Whooa, fuck, what's your deal?"
HNOC: "This is all fake, isn't it?"
Boss: "The Hell!?"
HNOC: *squints*
Boss: "What gave me away?"
HNOC: "Besides it being You?? Uh, you're using both arms to push the wheelchair."
Boss: "So?"
HNOC: "One of them is in a CAST!" *sighs*
Boss: "Yeah?"
HNOC: "Oh sweet dying Jeezus..."
Boss: "I have a new thing going!"
HNOC: "Well that's a relief! Here I thought you were just dickin' around in here... as usual."
Boss: "Check this out!" *wheels himself towards his desk*
HNOC: *watches the pathetic show of ignorance*
Boss: "Hey, could ya?" *motions for Chick to push him*
HNOC: "RETARD! You're not injured!!"
Boss: "But I could be! Where's the compassion??"
HNOC: *walks towards door*
Boss: "NO! Wait! You haven't seen it yet!!"
HNOC: "Uurrggh, it never ends with you..."
Boss: "Get a load of this!!" *pulls up website*
HNOC: "What's this crap?"
Boss: "This crap, as you call it, is my contribution to the world!"
HNOC: *reads site heading* "Boss's Bunker Busting Booty... ??"
Boss: *shakes head yes, wide grin, proud as FUCK* [lol]
HNOC: "So, finally bottomed out and went into the porn biz, eh?"
Boss: "Porn? Psssss, bish please! This is survival gear!"
HNOC: "Surwhatal what?"
Boss: "Dehydrated food, water, supplies! Ya know, for the Apocalypse!"
HNOC: "Ooooh, so you're a doomtard?"
Boss: "Hey! Ms. High & Mighty, watch your words, it's COMING! You just wait!"
HNOC: *scrolls down page* "So, Prepper porn... "
Boss: "I'm providing a service. To people who have vision, foresight."
HNOC: "According to these prices, you're raping the desperate for a disgusting level of financial gain.."
Boss: "Outsmarting the end of the world don't come cheap, missy!"
HNOC: "Or with a conscience."
Boss: "Am I supposed to just give this stuff away, for free?"
HNOC: "No, but maybe you could leave it to reputable companies that know what they're doing.."
Boss: "You have NO faith in me!"
HNOC: "Not a drop!"
Boss: "See?"
HNOC: "When did I ever act like I did??"
Boss: "The Squatchin thing?"
HNOC: "Oh, that! I was just trying to get away from Rudy. Eye-rape is real, yo!"
Boss: "So it wasn't so we could have an adventure and ka-ching?"
HNOC: "No sweetie, by some fucked up kind of miracle, you just happened to be the lesser of two evils that day."
Boss: "Shit..."
HNOC: "Yeah..."
Boss: "What the fuck am I gonna do with five-hundred pounds of dehydrated food rations?"
HNOC: "I guess make room in that garage, right next to all those boxes of Pimp Jesus t-shirts...."
Boss: *sighs*
Chick leaves his office for once, without wanting to kill him. Well, not really wanting to. Maybe a little... lol
