What are buttcheeks for?

[FUN-G]

The thing I never got was what an ex GF called "shelf ass".
Like I broke up with her from a stupid argument from this.
Not a chubby person, a normal looking mufucka, with a huge ass?
You have a perfectly apportioned person.
With this this huge ass sticking out the back.
I think it must be aliens. How can you have this huge ass sticking out?
Despicable aliens.
We got a war to get on with.