You ever feel like your life is a Quentin Tarantino film?

[somethingelseishere]

God dangit what I wouldn't give for a damn Lil Debbies chocolate/cake treat right now.

https://www.walmart.com/grocery/ip/Fresh.../584123898

*me standing next to the counter looking down at its magnificent glory*

"I'm a whore. I'm a bad, bad dirty whore. And I need you in my mouth..."

[Mister Obvious]

Man I legit don't even like cake or sweets that much in general, but damn.

I think I kinda want it.

[Mister Obvious]

Ice cold milk.

Fuuuuuuuuck.

[Mister Obvious]

GOAT MILK.

[Mister Obvious]

I just came so hard my grandma's grandma's grandma squirted.

[Mister Obvious]

RETROCAUSALITY BAYYYBEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[somethingelseishere]

I just came so hard my grandma's grandma's grandma squirted.

"I wanna see the Inception specs on THAT!" *Fred Sanford's voice*

[Mister Obvious]

Oh this shit is LAYERSSSS deep.

[Atma]

I just came so hard my grandma's grandma's grandma squirted.

(Holds freshly popped popcorn under the stream). Now that's a well-seasoned butter. Let's gooooo

[Mister Obvious]

I am so fucking hungover today.

From what?

Literally...

JUST my Quentin Tarantino-esque life.

That's it.

THAT'S LITERALLY IT.

[Mister Obvious]

JUST MY LIFE.

THAT'S IT.

[Mister Obvious]

I have the strange urge to dunk my entire head in ice water and then proceed to breathe the ice water because it just seems like it WOULD FEEL BETTER THAN THIS.

[somethingelseishere]

That totally sounds like one of the things I used to want to do during my
real-life actual alcohol hangovers. Dude - and this isn't a brag - they were brutal. *sigh*

So glad to be clean & sober!

[Mister Obvious]

I just need to drink a shitload of water cuz I'm guessing I didn't have enough yesterday.

Also raining here, I am extremely sensitive to fronts and the weather.

So that's for sure why I have a headache and whatnot.

[Mister Obvious]

Other than that, I feel FIIIIIIRE as fuck today.

And I even got up early...

Like for some reason I just woke up with pure zest.

[Mister Obvious]

Definite case of dehydration...

I was thinking about how much I drank yesterday, and I had nowhere near enough water.

I am taking this hard plastic juice jug I did finish off yesterday and making a nice mix of super watered down cranberry juice in it, and I am gonna make sure I drink at least half that bottle today.

Maybe I could even manage to drink the whole thing if I tried to.

[Mister Obvious]

This is a 1.89 litre bottle so yeah I gotta drink the whole thing.

Wow, if I can manage to drink this whole bottle full of (mostly) water today...

And like, if I can make that a daily thing...

Holy crap, I bet that alone would be a HUGE improvement in my life.

This is so cool.

I woke up with this headache today for a REASON...

It was to turn over this new leaf.

God I'm so grateful!!!

[Atma]

You are a motherfucking alchemist. <3

[Mister Obvious]

Thank youuuu!!!!!!!!!!!

[Mister Obvious]

So I've already been chugging a bunch on this bottle and I gotta say, I think I'm starting to feel the headache ease up already!

It makes sooo much sense that I got dehydrated because I didn't drink nearly enough yesterday (shamefully small amount) and it is MEGGGAAAA warm and dry here!

Yay, I feel so enriched by this conclusion and I'm stoked to discipline myself into drinking enough daily.

It's so important.