"Gunsmoke" (1955) - Review & Commentary

[Mister Obvious]

S5 E28 - "Crowbait Bob"

3:15 roflmfaololol, I kind of agree though, NGL.

11:30 pft, I'd be like hell no. That guy obviously knows something. Regardless, he meant it to go to Kitty and those are his final wishes... Kitty better tell that guy to fuck right off.

[Mister Obvious]

A bit odd that this video was posted only 11 hours ago...

[Mister Obvious]

That channel has 9 mil. subs and posts often, lots of content about old Hollywood too, but I still find the timing interesting.

[user328]

23:20 this Jack Elam guy kinda looks like Hugo Weaving.

You need to watch at least the first 20 minutes of Once Upon a Time in the West. It's possibly the best 20 minutes of film ever created. There's a hilarious scene with Elam trapping a fly in the barrel of his revolver.

[Mister Obvious]

Awesome, thanks for the recommendation... I really like that guy, there's just something about him.

I want to get into watching western movies, but I'm afraid I won't enjoy it... "Tombstone" (1993) is on Amazon Prime and I've thought about watching that too.

[Mister Obvious]

MR. DILLON WILL SEE YOU NOW

[Mister Obvious]

S5 E29 - "Colleen So Green"

0:10 I dunno if it's just this media player I'm using or if there really aren't any subtitles provided for this episode, but yeah, no options for subtitles are showing in the menu. Same disc as the last episode was on so I guess it's just this episode? We'll see.

0:42 he probably can't read.

1:00 TBH this guy's a pushy asshole, but I almost kinda like him. Character first impressions.

1:46 practically getting married in this scene. I'm guessing this is Colleen?? Is that Julie Andrews?? Honest to God looks like Julie Andrews, lmao, who IS this?! Hell no it's not Julie Andrews, lmao... https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Joanna_Moore It's not entirely inconceivable that it COULD be Julie Andrews though, I mean she's 1 year younger than this chick and she was definitely a star by then. Anyways.

2:30 oh God, he's singing the Kansas song again...

2:37 Matt even looks LOW key annoyed, lmao. Maybe I'm just assuming, but yeah.

2:50 lol, I do love Chester though.

3:26 the music is absurdly high quality.

4:50 I smell bullshit, but... I will say this, if you knew the marshal in a specific town was a fineass mofo, this would be the perfect ruse to prey on any sympathies he may be inclined to!

5:16 he seems sooooo serious. There's definitely no "in" with him. Like not even a hint of one.

5:40 definite definite bullshit.

6:30 lmao... honestly?? If I couldn't get Matt, I'd definitely go for Doc. If I couldn't get Doc, I'd go for Chester.

7:00 I've never seen Doc be this charmed... I'm kinda turned on TBH.

7:08 lmfao Chester is trying to make sure Doc doesn't get in with her.

7:38 oh man, I forgot about this guy, lmao. They're playing all this whimsical music though, I can't imagine him being some kinda creepster set to THAT music.

8:09 at least he's tried to clean up. I guess if I couldn't get Chester...

8:50 I dunno, he's kinda nice.

9:00 I'd take him up on it. And if a lesbian affair with Miss Kitty didn't work out, I'd probably go for him.

10:20 ol' Marshal Dillon sure ain't sweatin' the bitchez, is he?? Cucumber cool! That's why we love him.

12:00 what do you wanna bet she tries to seduce him right here and now?

12:08 lmao that was the LEAST warm and friendly/happily he's EVER said his name. Lmfaololol.

13:08 "But, now, Marshal, if YOU offered..."

14:30 he's got a great hairline, I see that widow's peak, baby!!!

15:38 roflmfarolmfaofalmrofloaloalol her house is full of stuff people have been bringing.

16:13 uhhh, he GAVE her a house, so I'm thinkin' he must not be that fucking bad?! She has the deed.

16:35 pft, the hell they are... when has a man GIVEN YOU a house, Miss Kitty?! Sheeheheheheeeiiiittt. Kitty's got nothing to bitch about though, it's not like Marshal Dillon is trippin' over the town's new tail.

17:28 BAHAHAHAHAHA. I definitely do agree with Kitty in a lot of ways though. She's definitely right about her.

17:38 it's interesting he calls her a "taskmaster" because when she mentioned the bars for protection, I thought of Saturn... Kronos, the chained planet, also known as "Father Time" and the "Taskmaster".

18:17 looks like she's about to beat the absolute fucking snot out of him in this card game and she's pretending she doesn't even know how to play.

19:07 I sure hope she DOES know what she's doing.

21:46 look at the nod Matt gives to Doc... this character is so real.

22:20 I wish there were subtitles... can't understand what Doc says here.

23:18 "How much'd you lose??" Roflfmaorlfmafoalol YUUUUUUUP.

[Mister Obvious]

S5 E30 - "The Ex-Urbanites"

0:20 this one has the option for subtitles, so that's good.

1:44 it's Ken Curtis in a guest star role.

8:27 I'm guessing this episode isn't gonna have much Marshal Dillon in it.

10:15 oh God, this is a friggen nightmare, lol.

12:02 oh good Lord.

22:30 well I guess they can take a nap now!

23:30 see I wondered when that was gonna happen, considering James Arness IS in every episode.

24:00 God his voice is so nice.

[Mister Obvious]

Quick note on timestamps...

I'm using a different media player to watch the DVDs now, it's better than the last one I was using but it seems like the time is off every now and then. I dunno how or why that could possibly happen... could be happening when I skip back to rewatch certain scenes, pause, skip ahead, etc. In any case I do my best to make them accurate but if you find any timestamps noted earlier or later than what they should be, I do apologize. I'm mindful of this seeming glitch and try to check my timestamps for accuracy, but nobody's perfect!

[Mister Obvious]

S5 E31 - "I Thee Wed"

0:01 https://i.imgur.com/rsGcAg2.png *sex moan*

1:18 fuck she's gorgeous.

2:10 Kitty's pleasant and dreamy recitings of Tennyson's poetry interrupted by wife-beatin', lmao.

2:50 I knew he was gonna say that.

2:56 seems like they made Marshal Dillon every woman's dream man on every level... hopefully this trend continues unfailingly all throughout the series.

3:10 I'll look like this lady if I live to be old. She looks like Mrs. Claus... that's hot.

3:40 a Johnny Depp style cover story for the abuser, lmao.

4:30 looks like that guy back there on the right is wearing a denim jacket... they were first released by Levi Strauss in 1880. I guess by now in the show, it could be around that time.

5:13 oh hell yeah baby, just go ahead and take that shirt ALL the way off!!! This is the most chest we've ever seen from Marshal Dillon!!!

5:27 I'd like to bite his lips!!!

6:15 Marshal Dillon was probably shot like 20 times on this show. Hmmm. LOL, there's an article about everything!

Near as I can figure, Marshal Dillon was shot 56 times, but I've heard the count could be higher.

https://truewestmagazine.com/article/how...n-gunsmoke

6:27 oh God, what I wouldn't give to have that big sexy hand under my head.

11:40 not so bad that he can't smack a bitch up, lmao!!!

12:12 the judges are always suuuper unlikable, lol.

12:37 yeah, SHEEEEEUUUUTTTUHHHHPPPP.

15:30 well that judge ended up making us like him after all!

18:27 I'd have loaded up everything I wanted to take and gotten the hell out of Dodge while that piece of crap was in jail.

[Mister Obvious]

S5 E32 - "The Lady Killer"

OoooOooOoo, this sounds good!!!

1:00 oh damn, that's an evil lookin' saloon girl.

5:40 so I guess there are other hotels in Dodge, they're just not as nice as the Dodge House.

7:00 the Marshal's gonna be a hard sell on this one.

8:56 1800s detective work... he knows the window was broken from the inside.

11:20 because of how tall he is, it always looks like he's staring directly at tits when he talks to a chick, rofl.

24:56 lmao.

[Mister Obvious]

A bit odd that this video was posted only 11 hours ago...

https://youtu.be/5KvEyL7wvws

Honestly, fuck that video for endorsing speculation that SHE gave her final husband AIDS just because she had traveled to Africa a few times.

That's just fucking stupid. He was bisexual, or maybe simply gay.

He'd obviously already had it for a considerable amount of time when he died 1 year after their marriage. He died in 1985 and she died in 1989. If she'd had it before him, she'd have died first.

It's 2022, this isn't the fucking dark ages of knowledge about that topic anymore. People need to get a fucking clue.

It doesn't matter if they never even consummated their marriage, there are any number of ways she could have come into contact with his blood and become infected. I'm tired of hearing this BS rumor about her giving it to him, especially in this day and age, just wow.

[Mister Obvious]

S5 E33 - "Gentlemen's Disagreement"

3:43 well thank God, TBH.

4:54 Is that Audrey Hepburn!? Roflmao... I'm just funnin' ;) https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fintan_Meyler She does look like her though! They were born the same year... must be an archetypal thing.

6:06 he's got his "serious face" down to a fine art, lol.

7:08 I love these old school ribbon ties... I dunno why they had to change the style to those big long gaudy things they wear now.

8:00 this guy's pretty hot though.

11:36 they mentioned Louisville earlier, I wondered if they were talking about Kentucky and they were!!! Marshal Dillon's been all over. I'd like to have him all over me!!! *dancing banana*

12:12 he's got a nice gun.

13:13 is he wearing an animal print vest?? That's sorta weird, lol.

14:50 he's absolutely gorgeous.

16:50 she did it, not him. It's something a woman would do.

20:20 bummer, I'm still waiting for him to kill a lady!!!

21:30 Doc is so sexy.

21:55 this saloon girl regular Connie Lamont has the perfect face for blurry/long distance background scenes, she's striking and has a great presence.

22:25 this guy's kinda hot too.

[Mister Obvious]

Today is James Arness's 99th birthday!!!

[Mister Obvious]

Go forth and multiply! Name all your children after Gunsmoke characters/actors!

[Mister Obvious]

S5 E34 - "Speak Me Fair"

1:20 https://imgur.com/a/f2r2u31 this opening scene reminded me of the opening scene from "Melancholia" (2011), at 1:45... https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oA4BpcIfH10 Is there some kind of symbolism that I'm unaware of??

5:08 are these two chicks gonna kiss each other or something?

5:39 I'd like to bite the back of her neck.

9:30 Matt "Panty Melter" Dillon.

12:10 nice jacket, asshole! It's Ken Curtis AGAIN. Gettin' kinda tired of seeing him in non-Festus roles. I think he's hot and all, but he kinda creeps me out as other people.

22:42 I love it when Marshal Dillon gets that "Comin' for that ass" look on his face.

24:04 we get to see him beat the shit out of somebody in almost every episode now!

24:12 the stunt double looks nothing like him, lol, I'm not complaining though.

[Mister Obvious]

S5 E35 - "Belle's Back"

Hmmm, Belle huh? Sounds familiar. I wonder if it really is a character from a past episode. It'd be one of the first returning characters, besides stagecoach driver Jim.

2:38 definitely not a recurring character. It's just made up in the story.

7:25 pft whatever, it'd be totally awesome to live at the Dodge House.

24:25 "I'm gonna miss that outlaw dick so bad!"

25:00 I'd MAKE him do that! *dancing banana*

[Mister Obvious]

S5 E36 - "Bobsy Twins"

4:16 well I sure didn't figure on that happening... lmao.

11:55 shit I wouldn't if I were you, man. Hey maybe he'll kill these guys.

14:10 so what are these guys, like double serial killers?? Seems like them thar serial killers were pretty common in the old west.

15:26 Chester and Matt look extra handsome in this scene. Chester has nice lips. https://imgur.com/a/mPhAckw

15:45 dressing like a cowboy automatically makes ANYONE 10 times sexier... https://i.imgur.com/dBthlou.png I love those gun belts with the bullets, so hot.

18:00 these guys are just plain nuts.

21:37 lmfao Doc's always grandstanding with his philosophical quotes and poeticism.

22:27 they've finally found an "Indian" and THIS is how they're killing him???

[Mister Obvious]

S5 E37 - "Old Flame"

3:00 this woman is the first person I have seen on this show who gives away the nearness of the 1950s... https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Marilyn_Maxwell She gives me 1940s actress vibes, very unmistakable. This is my concern with the guest stars as the seasons unfold... I suspect there will be more who give away the true era. Unfortunate. I guess it was unavoidable though, it's a numbers game.

3:50 I think it must be the obviously fake peroxide blonde hair. If she'd had a different hair color, she may have been passable. Something in the way she speaks gives away the era too though. If they dyed James Arness's beautiful naturally light hair on a constant basis for the show, then the guest stars should have been subject to the same rule. Fair is fair.

7:40 there's still no hint whatsoever of this chick (or any other chick I've seen on here, really) having an "in" with the marshal. He treats everybody pretty much the same. There's not a discernible hint of weakness in him when it comes to these women.

8:38 imagine landing a hotass dude like that. Even if he wasn't your husband... just having him around now and then would be amazing.

13:17 I meeeeeeean, kinda.

15:00 I would be VERY suspicious of her at this point. I hope Matt is.

16:16 strange lookin' guy... very handsome though, he seems nice. I think he knows something about that woman that she doesn't want getting out. Or maybe she's just trying to get revenge on him for something.

18:16 yuuuuuup.

19:20 oo damn. He looks kinda mad. I'd be scared in the pants if he walked at me like that. Totally fucking aroused, but a lil scared. Yowza!!!

19:55 oh wow, what a bitch!

20:40 ICE ICE BABY.

25:20 oh I'm sure she'll just settle for some dick, Matt.

[Mister Obvious]

S5 E38 - "The Deserter"

1:08 obvious bandit is obvious.

4:45 I passionately love every single bartender the Long Branch has ever had.

5:08 if I'm not mistaken, it seems like Matt is telling Kitty to work that ass!!!

21:10 wow these people are dumb as hell.

24:00 he looks like he fell in love a little bit, lmao!

24:10 "Oh, don't worry about it, ma'am. I've killed hundreds of men in my time, you'll feel better soon!"

24:50 she's wise though.